Letters to Elizabeth, 9 months.

Dear Elizabeth

A part of me regrets not writing to you on the previous milestones. i wasn’t in the mood then, i wasn’t ready to talk about it then, i wasn’t all there mentally then, the words wouldn’t come… excuses excuses.. so here i do a mash up, chop-chop version of the events leading to now.

you were born, while most women would tell you childbirth is one of the most profound experiences in their lifetime, let mummy tell you, it was not one of my favourite. there is nothing fun about trying to pull a fishball out of your nostrill –dont try that!– but it got me, you so that day is forever etched in my memory darling. i truly felt like i left the last dregs of “girl” behind and became a woman (hormonal, sweaty, weepy, angry..) that day.

you had your tongue-tie snipped, that was probably more painful emotionally for mummy than physically for you. daddy and mama connie went into the procedure room with you while mummy sat outside bawling — i wasn’t allowed in as i was to prepare to nurse you. you were a champ though. 2 mins after, it was like it never happened.

you first smiled at me, you were, and still remain, a happy contented child. you are not a crier, often we wake to hear you gurgling in laughter. this world must be a funny world to you — a beautiful baby in front of us, and we adults spend our times stressing out in front of our big screens

you turned one month old, anyone who tells you one-month olds are fun, are lying. eat, sleep, poop, repeat. ah, those wonderful days. but it was lovely to watch your daddy fall in love with you, over and over.

you had your first vaccination, we like your PD very much, he was mummy’s PD too. we werent really used to hearing you scream in anger so this vacc tickled us greatly, sweetheart — sorry, we laughed as you screamed then glared very angrily (as angrily as babies can) at the nurse

you were hospitalized for salmonella, we are fanatic about the cleaniness of your stuff, and noone really knows how you caught it. PD says its probably an inheritance from mummy that you caught on the way out. this sensitive tummy would constantly plaque us over the next few months.

you discovered TV, ah life got easier for us. you are clearly your father’s daughter. once the TV is on, you are enraptured. you can clearly identify your favourite characters : billy and bam bam, vocabu-larry, stick with mick. oh sweetheart, your first crush was on a little blue/purple boy with a red cap and baggy pants. you’d laugh and blush whenever he came on screen.

you tried your first solids, nightmare. you reject everything new violently, and had this amazing ability to projectile your displeasure all over everyone. right now, you like pumpkin, corn, carrots, spinach, rice (not porridge), cereal, pears. you completely dislike fish, chicken, mangoes. ice-cream is your current favourite. i know, what awful parents would give their child sugars and processed dairy? but their fussy-pot child giggles and would-do-anything-for-ice-cream — even tummy time. and also because your mama christine pretends to crave ice-cream every afternoon so she has an excuse to “share” with you.

oh baby. how loved, are you?




Author: c

my world, out of your reach

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