met an old friend today


 we were young, and they called it puppy-love.

he taught me to blade, and watched me stomp off barefeet, holding the blades. he took me to frog island to see the skippers. he brought me to the open seas and showed me the raw elements of storm and lighting and rain, and got me home safe. he drove me wherever i wanted to go, even arab street for by bead hunts. he cycled to my place everynight of the holidays, just for a 3 hour nap before getting home before parents woke up. we house sat, for a week or so, for his grandparents.

we made pacts– of bali after ORD. they never came to pass.

i miss this old friend today, this crazy mushroom/chicken head.

he sounded like he needed a hug. *hug*

who am i to judge him? (for we all have our own little secrets)




i’m feeling particularly bitchy today. B-i-t-c-h-y, with a Capital B.

oh dear.

not to mention, i think i’ve got separation anxiety issues when it comes to the pea, so we’ve been rather short with each other recently (read: every end of the weekend, when he goes home after staying with me over the weekend)


the weekend is over, which means i am on the v-e-r-g-e again.

all i want to do, right, is to lie on the beach and waste the day away adn maybe, just maybe do some crazy craft at the end of the day, even if its a stupid felt stuff-toy.

tomorrow’s another packed day, and there wont be reprieve until friday again. hit replay. fucks.

not very coherant. should just f-off and bury my head under the pillows.


i’ve been fairly silent for a while,

which means to say work has kept me rather busy.

but here’s some updates

1. bronco’s hair isnt growing quickly enough, and its making me regret ever cutting off his baby down. :( he’s gotten into that “sweaty looking” stage, sigh, and smells like that too. his face is ever-so-dirty and refuses to be cuddled in bed anymore. teenage angst.

2. we’ve adopted a beautiful simba, and i spent the whole afternoon combing his fur. oh my. i want to sleep on him! he hasn’t really eaten much yet–and is still rather stoic around the other dogs,  but generally a wonderful inclusion in the family.

3. the prefect is back, finally–after a week of lost luggages and yellow crazy ants on Christmas Island, she now has 1st degree burns and was given 2 days off school. o_O. good news is that she’s still dating the khoo-kia. whom i still haven’t met, btw. i am retaliating becos the prefect refuses to sleep with me tonight.

4. i’ve finally caught on to the “little nonya” fever and watched the first half of the show. episode 18 to be exact. but i am stopping here, because from everything i hear, it goes downhill from here– and good pple suffer and bad pple prosper. so i am not watching on so everyone who should live happily ever after lives happily ever after.

5. i havent heard from the huffle in a few days–i hope you’re okay sweetiepie.


spent 2 hours on

don’t get me wrong, i have tons to do in my day. people to meet, deliveries to make, proposals to write, accounts to close, staff to deal with. it is a very busy easily 12 hour day for me and the breast flen, who works with me. we have to conscientiously decide “no more work talk” when we hang out, and even so we revert to staff issues within 10 mins.

but this morning i decided i would catch up on the news, and reading different news websites.

then i got stuck. guantanamo. i love gitmo articles.

gitmo photoessay from

2 hours. gone.

dead things

today has been a strange day of dead things.


bee bee killed a bird today in full view of Rita, Ann, Ting & I. all we heard was a “meep!” which we assume came from the bird bee bee tackled and something (we later found out to be the bird) running across the driveway, then bee bee lunging after it. having heard me scream her name, bee bee sheepishly walked away with a turf of feathers sticking out of her mouth. being the chicken that i am i of course did not go and see what was what, but the prefect reported seeing a leg twitch. we all cohesively shouted for our trusty ruby to come totting out to ask what was what. by the time she went to access the condition of the bird, she declared it dead and took it away.

poor bird. but it’s really not bee’s fault, it’s her hunting companion nature, really. it really was a pretty big eye opener to see how her instincts kick in. she is afterall, a cocker spaniel, and what other dog is better that the cocker spaniel in hunting birds?! but well well well, that fat dog certainly has her instincts alright.

then there was the whole discussion on “how to kill a rat”– drowning, poisoning, set on fire, scalding, starving. of course all these methods significantly horrify me because lets face it, we all know what a chicken shit i am about dead things. someone suggests to dump into a trash bag and stomp on the head. (apparently the skull is easy to break); instant death. and that seriously rocked my world a bit. i would have just driven the rat to the far off park and let it go.

i remember this one traumatising experience after training at eka, waiting in the car for the dinogirl to come in after she packs up her stuff. and there was this group of chefs who caught a rat in their restaurant. they had thrown some form of liquid fat/fuel/alcohol on it, and then the fuckers proceeded to flick their lit cigarette butts at it. the rat instantly caught fire, and burned a bright blue. it was such a huge flame! and the rat, oh the poor rat was screaming and jumping around and thrashing about the cage! the cage even lifted off the ground and flipped because the rat was fighting that hard.  i could hear the scream from inside the car, windows up, engine started. the men laughed about it as if it were some damn amusement. i sat there and squeezed my eyes shut and then when i reopened them 10 s ( i remember counting in my head) it was all over. i burst out into tears and i drove up to them (but because i was too frantic i put the celica in the neutral gear rather than drive and ended up making a very big ROARRRRRR then paisay change to drive) and yelled at them about how they were all gonna burn in hell for such a heinous act and how cruel they were. they stared at me and i was there, red faced and teary monster glare. yelling. some pretended they didnt understand, the others shuffled the charred rat and cage out of my sight. i asked to speak to the manager, mr cigarette butt. i gave him a earful (imagine, this is me, post-trauma, feeling very sorry for the fate of the rat, and it was very very new in my visual memory) and told him i was going to report his restaurant to the NEA and to the SPCA or the AVA.

which i did, eventually. the NEA said they’d go and inspect their restaurant. the SPCA or the AVA however didn’t take my words very seriously, “it was afterall, a rat, a pest…” but surely, surely they are animals too, and more importantly they feel pain and fear just like we do. are we then as a society choosing to protect cats and dogs and the pink dolphins but rats no?

 i am not saving SAVE THE RATS! i’m not. i think rats are indeed pests and have to be culled before diseases are spread. but there has gotta be a better way.

i haven’t got the answer as to so what do we do with the trapped rat? i dunno. i really don’t. i hope i dont have to lay out a rat trap. but even if i do, i am thankful the pea will dispose of the rat for me (however he wants to do it as long as it wasn’t cruel) and then we’d find a patch of grass and bury him. or if the pea doesn’t want to kill the rat, then we’d just drive it to the fields at the back of the estate and let them go.